Valentino Kanzyani - Palazzo - Volume Six

maroko, May 09, 2008

From the pathetic cover art, from the kick off milisecond down to the closing beat, everything about Valentino Kanzyanis "Palazzo volume 6" made me throw my chicken wings six feet high up in the air! I mean, what gives? Is there a man belonging to the realm of techno who fell harder than this once great DJ/producer? Dont get me wrong here, as Im all against purism and constantly cashing in on one same formula, but my God, this IS awful, no matter how you look at it. Sure a great producer and DJ should be acquainted and at ease with more than just one style of music, but Valentino is absolutely out of ideas here. Lazy fading in and out of tracks instead of state of the art mixing and turntable tricks and treats is what the man has to offer here. If only the track selection was something to look up to here, but far from it. These are crumbs from the big table. Leftovers even my grandmother would not want to bust a move to. Its painful how dull, souless and shallow these tunes are. Yuck!
I could not use this alleged minimal DJ mix as a sleeping tool. I was trying to get in touch with my inner self by the third track. Didnt really work. My cerebrum refused to fall asleep with whilst being subdued to this torture.
Speaking of torture, somewhere around track 6-7 I was suddenly chained to a wall in some random medival dungeon. Remember how they use to drive people insane by letting drops of cold water drip on their head in equal intervals? That sums it up.
I awake. Track #13. It wasnt a nightmare after all. But this could possible be one. My skin is beginning to develop an acute rash. Can it be the music? Nooooooo... The lowest common denominator minimal nonsense is the name of the game here. I am generally able to enjoy and appreciate any style of electronic music but this is showing disrispect, and nothing but, to the patient listener!
What went wrong between the sensational first two installations of the "Rock The Discotheque" series and this? Valentino, stop ego tripping, get your head out of your own ass, and bless us with some decent mixing like you used to, and like we ALL KNOW you can. Alright? Cause this sounds like getting smacked with plastic bags full of hot urine across the cheeks. Next please. An all around disgrace to the otherwise fairly decent Palazzo DJ mix series.

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