Hair... THE WORST HAIRCUTS (EVER!) ON A RECORD COVER - A Crowd Donated Installation Art Piece By Stephen Rumney

By HOLYGRAILS HOLYGRAILS
updated about 10 hours ago

Yes, Diggin Deep ya'll to bring you the best of the Worst Haircuts (Ever!) On A Record Cover. PM me for any suggestions for the list. Many thanks, DJ 2 Dam Funky (aka HOLYGRAILS).

THIS IS A CROWD DONATION INSTALLATION ART PIECE… One in a series of Art Pieces I'm creating… if you have any of these covers or any of the covers in my other lists please in box and donate the records and covers to the crowd donated artwork. Condition of record not important :-). To get on the donator's list for the art piece please enclose a note with the package with your credit line "Donated By...". Many thanks for your contribution... Please send donated cover to: Record Cover Installation Project, 53 Belmont Hill, London SE13 5AX, United Kingdom.

  1. Bill Ramsey - Haschisch Halef Omar (Haschu Haschisch Ini Tasche)

    1 For Sale from $7.85

    Interestingly 'Bill Ramsey - Haschisch Halef Omar' is an anagram of: "HA!!! – FLASHY ASS COMB-HELL HAIR-CRIME'

  2. Jefferson Lincoln - Jefferson Lincoln

    13 For Sale from $2.42

    In the left corner Jefferson Lincoln, the undisputed world heavyweight champion of bad hair... on the cover of his self titled Jefferson Lincoln album. Officially ranking as the worst haircut of all time... all other haircuts can only bow in the presence of the master. The beauty about this one is that a quick glance at the cover and it it is difficult to know where the hair stops and the jacket begins... but on closer inspection this is not a coincidence: it is a considered styling choice and a quintessential example of 70's fashion. Despite that 'spontaneous' caught in the moment look a classic cover like this does not just happen by chance... No expense was spared in getting the headphone whisps just right and hours of preparation went in to the making of this cover to capture that 'natural' moment, a moment where everything came together in perfection. Months were spent cultivating the moustache for this album and prior to growing the moustache there were many years of hard graft at the curling tongs. It then took weeks of scouring the markets by day and late night shopping to find just the right coat to compliment the haircut. On a cold autumnal morning in 1976 (or perhaps 1975) this historic cover was shot. It's not the only thing that should have been shot that day. However if he had been mistaken for wild game and died on that day he would not have inspired a generation of Top Gear TV presenters and the world would have been a very different place from the one we know today. We have Jefferson Lincoln to thank for the diversity and individualism he brought to the world and and leaving us his legacy clinching number one pole position in the World's Worst Haircut on a record 'EVER!'

  3. Franky Dee (3) - 'Eva

    1 For Sale from $9.99

    Worst haircut on a record cover EVA?... well nearly! ... A good friend emigrated to Nigeria and left me his boogie and Afro-Funk collection and amongst the gems I found this great record by Franky Dee... as you can tell by the cover it was a self released vanity project and released on his own label out of Lauderdale, Florida. What record company would allow such a photo to escape past their quality control department? The reason this shocking photo managed to get in to the public domain was that Franky cleverly released it on his own label thus circumnavigating censorship and professional record company advice. Love them or loathe them record companies serve to protect us from extreme cases of vanity exposure ... but unfortunately, not in this case as the smart Franky did everything himself and signed off the creative ... Most copies probably ended up in Franky's garage but this lovely 'still in shrink' sample managed to somehow slip out and survive the long journey across the Atlantic ocean... where rather than being rejected and immediately binned it was lovingly taken in by my good friend Obafunkie Jnr who gave it shelter for a while before eventually passing it on to me. Shortly after taking custodianship of this gravity defying mullet nugget I added it to discogs in Aug 2014 to feature in my Worst Haircuts (Ever!) On A Record Cover. And that week, Franky Dee went straight in at Number 2 only narrowly being pipped to the coveted number one spot by Jefferson Lincoln on his self titled 1976 album on Raven Records !!! ... The A side of Franky's 12" (where he sings) is predictably terrible and nearly as bad as his haircut... but the B-Side electro instrumental has a Man Parrish 'Hip-Hop Be-Bop' feel and is surprisingly different from what you'd probably be expecting had you happened upon this rarity in the dusty crates of a charity shop... Placing the vinyl on my Technics i'd predicted indulgent guitar solos and thrashing rock drums as I excitedly dropped the needle for the first time... but surprisingly not a guitar or live drum kit in sight ... just some heavy funk bass and body poppin' drum patterns... So the moral of the story... never judge a cover by its haircut... This is one for the 1980's electro diggers...

  4. صباح* بالاشتراك مع عصام رجي = Sabah With Issam Raggi* - مسرحية حلوي كتير = From The Play "Helwe Ktir"

    Historical fact: In 1974 scientists identified the first hole to appear in the earth's ozone layer due to a unusually dense cloud of aerosol over a photographic studio in Lebanon

  5. Wanda Jackson - Country Gospel

    The clue that this record was destined for the THE WORST HAIRCUTS (EVER!) ON A RECORD COVER! chart was there when the record was released... Catalogue number WST 9514 led me to investigate if there were any more WST haircuts to be found on this label and I quickly found some more gems including Evie and Mathew Ward (Who sneaks in just below in 4th place). For all entries to this chart I always like to see if the album track listing has any clues as to the artist's psychological state of mind when recording the album and becoming a contender for the Worst Haircut On An Album Cover Ever. In this case track B2 clearly unveils what was going through her head as the stylist put the finishing touches to this monster of a hairpiece and disappeared camera right... 'Why Me, Lord'. Sometimes we are in confusion as to our true destiny. It is only time that can truly reveal the purpose of your life. The answer took many years to be understood but your question is answered... 'Because you are to become immortalised in the top three worst haircuts on a record cover hall of fame.

  6. Matthew Ward (2) - Fade To White

    Now I'm bald OK so have nothing against bald men but the number one rule for baldies like me is go bald with dignity... don't try and be something you're not... or can never be... it's bad enough for men with a full head of hair to go for the 'Jesus Christ' look but in this case, oh lordy lord, Mathew Ward defied baldies cardinal rule and grew out the little hair that the great man above had given him. Now Jesus could get away with it and besides who's going to make fun of the Son Of God. We don't know for certain if Jesus was bald or had a full head of hair but even if he was bald, In Zero AD Jesus had mittigating circumstances... the man was a trend setter, he performed miricles, walked on water and out shone all contemporary performers of his time. In PR and branding terms it was important for him to stand out in crowd, have an individual look and be clearly recognisable from the back of an auditorium or while orating and performing miracles in large public spaces.

    Viewing Mathew's discography it is apparent that as time went on he boldly came out of the shadows to show off his whispy long hair. In 1979, on the cover of his debut album 'Toward Eternity' he began his pilgrimage, cleverly disguising the fact he was going thin by sitting in a darkened theatre, only showing off one side of his hair while keeping the rest discreetly out of view by some clever theatrical lighting. Seven years later in 1986 when his secret couldn't be hidden from public view any longer he released his long overdue follow up album, this time carefully positioning his head deep in the shadows and timidly revealing for the first time a receding hairline. What was lacking in the hair department was clevery counter balanced by the album title to show that he was not going to take any stick for being a baldie... he stood up to potential bullies and tormentors titling the album 'Armed And Dangerous'. I'm guessing tracks like 'Put On The Armour' were a macho stance for dealing with the pain of being the butt of baldie jokes which coincides with his timely public reveal that he had lost his manly crown of hair. Having apparently succeeded in facing the reality he had now lost his hair he soon came back with what can only be described as his 'revelation' album. The album heralds Mathew Ward was born again and his head is symbolically glowing like a guiding beacon as the golden rays of the sun shine from above to illuminate his egg-head. The album dealt head on with the issue of coming out as a bald man, overcoming the adversity of being taunted and losing his manhood. The album was a brave message to the world that revealed the inner spirit of a man who was facing the prospect of living without the beloved hair he had once loved and cherished in his earlier incarnation as a teenager. The song titles of this album document this very personal journey.

    Then I Realize
    Racing For The Goal
    You Alone
    Show Them
    Heart
    So Many Are Lookin'
    Time Will Tell
    Far Behind
    Perfect Union
    Fade To White

    The last track is of course a clever twist on the phrase 'Fade To Grey' as no matter how long other men more fortunate than myself and Mathew hold their crown of hair, all men fade to white in the end. His album of 1998 'My Redeemer' would have been my personal choice for the chart but it was only released as a CD so does not qualify for Worst Haircut on an Album Cover EVER!

  7. Evie (2) - Evie

    To see if a woman is a natural blonde check the eyebrows. Well it's not hard to figure out that she's not a natural blonde. But what is not so obvious is whether this is a wig or if it is truly her naturally bleached hair. I'm not a hair style expert but the question of whether it's a wig or natural is irrelevant as in either case she's done herself proud as every curl and wave compliments the contours in her chubby little lovable goofy face. Even the two tight curls subtly echo her two delightful dimples. The photographer got the lighting and framing perfect and all was left to do to finish the cover off was for the designer to drop her signature neatly in the space to the left of her head. I can just hear the art director now... move a little to the right... just a bit more, a little bit more... just a fraction now. It's a shame he did not asker to keep moving to the right til she was completely out of the frame but hey if he he'd done that we'd not have this supreme example of bad taste cheese to set the bar for kitsch lovers world wide so luckily for us he stopped her at the precise moment allowing the typography and photo balance in perfect harmony. Music geeks the world over scour the small print of records to discover writing credits and producers but sad as I am I look for stylists, photographers and art directors... no matter how good the music is, ultimately it's the unknown heroes behind the making of the cover, the art director, photographer, typographer and stylist who can make or break an artist. Iconic and memorable cover art gets indelably imprinted on the psyche of a generation and the cover is the artists one chance to shine in all their glory and encapsulate the message behind their music and unique 'brand'. Alas the true heroes behind this cover were never credited. They rightly predicted that this was an artist who like Madonna and Kylie would achieve global notoriety and be so recognisable that the team simply called the the album 'Evie'. This is master class in the design rule that 'Less Is More'. The less typography, the more we are able to appreciate the true awefulness of this cover. Ironically for them it was the cover they created that eventually caught the attention reserved for those few artists that are able to call themselves by a single name. The art director, photographer and hair stylist achieved what so many have sought to done throughout pop history, create a memorable iconic cover you'll never forget... the unknown team behind this masterpiece created a cover that goes down in haircut horror history and will surely haunt the psyches of generations to come.

  8. Beba Selimović - Zbogom

    6 For Sale from $0.73

    'Dosta Je Bilo Suza' roughly translates as ' Through A Hedge Backwards'

  9. Hülya - Ah Neyleyim Gönül / Baharın geldiği

    2 For Sale from $15.00

    The photo on this cover from Turkish popstar Hülya was ironically exactly the same expression she later had when she was shown the printer's proofs for her single.